life lessons I have learnt by a life coach

20 Aug 2017

Life is hard it will either break you or, make you. We fall apart and downward spiral in our hardest times in our life. In those times, we grow and redefine ourselves. We need times, of hardship in our lives to grow, in losing ourselves we find ourselves. How we choose to react to those time is up to us. If you resit what life throws at you, you will fall apart. We all fall apart we human we all break. It's not easy to accept the unacceptable nor will it ever be for anyone. Life is based on what you choose to let influence you, basically that comes down to you surround yourself with and how you react to the situations in your life. Life is meant to be enjoyed not a chore.

Impermanence and change are the greatest things in life. Nothing stays and nothing is permeant, be it an object, job, appearance, friends or relationship, situation, home. The mere fact of acknowledging each day and every relationship you have with anyone as being Impermanent and every changing will lesson every day stresses. We hate change but change in itself is a teacher and allows us to grow. Change is inevitable we get older our appearance changes that's life. So, you can see change and nothing being permeant is life really, we are always changing its the natural flow of life. We just tend to look at change as being bad when in fact its natural.

People can hurt you in many ways or love you in so many different ways. You choose who you want in your life. If a person doesn't make you feel good about yourself and others, happy in life. They worth cutting out of your life. That is hard be it acquaintances, friends or family your sanity is worth so much more then dealing with people who bring you down. The people we surround ourselves with are our biggest influencers, so pick wisely if you want to be happy surround yourself with happy people. What we do and say rubs off on the people around us. Always choose to lift each other up  rather than break each other down. If you find you have to remove people from your life do so for whatever reason. People are your mirror, what you hate in them is something you actually do yourself. 

Happiness we all want it and want it to last forever but everything changes and nothing is permanent. How do we achieve daily happiness that ultimately is a choice you decide to be happy. Life can make you unhappy if you don't like your job leave find a new one. Not happy in a relationship fix it don't try over and over again then your just being silly move on. If you don't like where you at in life change as human we are change so be the change and do what you must to be happy in life. Do things that make you happy, be selfish and spend time alone in nature not in front of a screen. Remember you won't always be happy but life is changing all the time accept where you’re at and live and be the best version of yourself.

Emotions can control and stop you from doing so many things. Controlling your emotions will never be easy and your emotions will always be there. As a person you are not your emotions, your emotions are brought about how you think and react to a situation that's what makes you unhappy. So how you think is what makes you unhappy. Remember you are not your thoughts or emotions, you are peace and stillness underneath all of it. Always take time to breath follow the breath as it travels in and out close your eyes and in doing this you will see thoughts stop the mind quietens. Do this daily and in quiet. When emotions come I have learnt its best to sit with them alone and feel the emotion in its entirety. In doing that it weakens because I'm accepting it and I'm allowing it to be there, I then ask myself what's beneath this emotion the answers will surprise you. Doing this whenever emotion comes up lessens it you let it pass through you, you don't let it consume you be it anger, fear, sadness etc.

Acceptance so many times in life it surprises us by throwing things at us that we cannot or will not accept. The problem is if we don't accept it we creating more emotions for ourselves and not moving forward, basically we resisting what's natural in life and that's change. Nothing is permanent change is happening as you read this. I have learnt to accept the unacceptable by simply saying to myself I will allow myself to accept whatever it may be, over and over in my head when I feel the emotion of that which  I am struggling to change. This creates a ripple effect in my sub conscious and slowly I will accept the change.

Self love I can't say that achieving self loves is easy society has not exactly made that easy for us. We surrounded by media images of models that are toned and gorgeous. We aspire to be like that and hope that will make us love ourselves more, what we need to do is accept our body for what it is and how it serves us and in doing that you love your body more. I love my body more now than I did when I was 16 tall skinny and modelling you know why because my body has got me through so much and I'm proud of what I have achieved. Don't rely on the social media likes you get and how many followers you have to bring a sense of self worth to you. The image you create on social media is not you, there's no person to person contact, social media doesn't show  the essence of who you truly are. Rejection is something as human being we face in all aspects of our lives if we fear it we bring more of it into our life to get over rejection is loving yourself completely. Loving yourself also comes down to what you say to your self your self talk. If you think your ugly well you are because you told yourselves that and believed it, you’re not ugly. Positive affirmations  go a long way in helping you change your negative talk that you feed to your sub conscious mind.  Always start and affirmation with I and whatever you want to bring about in the present tense be it financial gain, friendships, new job etc. An example is I am wealthy say it to yourself daily and see yourself being wealthy even if you’re not. 

The thing I see with life is its always changing and that's what makes it interesting. We always going to change and we always going to have something that makes us fall apart but we get back up changed and ready for the next chapter. Emotions need to be seen as being emotions not your true self. Choose to surround yourself with the most positive people. Most of all love, love what you do love all the people close to you be it friends or family everything can change in the blink of an eye. Choose to be happy and do what it takes to make you happy. Live the life when you look back and see what you have come through and be in awe every time of what you achieved. Accept life for what it is always changing and impermeant that makes you more relaxed in how you treat every facet of your life. Just go into the world inspire people and love yourself.

Written By Kamically Fused Life Coach

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